Just to add on to my previous post, I was sitting in class the other day minding my own business and I discovered a grey hair. In my head. I am fully horrified by this. I am only 17 years old, and I'm finding grey hairs already, this can't be good. I blame grade 12 for this very unfortunate event that has taken place on my head. I think I need to do some yoga, or meditation or something, because if this escalates any further, I will have wrinkles. I cannot let that happen.
Thursday, 13 December 2012
Christmas Shopping/Stress
Just as an update, I've been working at Watch It now for about a month. I really enjoy it, at least compared to my other job. I've been having an abundance of hours lately, and as much as I like that because I'm making good money, I'm also extremely exausted. I have a lot on my plate right now, now that I think of it. On pay day (Dec 21st) I need to finish all my Christmas shopping. Which shouldn't be too difficult since I have a brief idea and budget for every person i'm buying for. But on the other hand, it's so close to Christmas I don't know if I'll be able to find everything I'm looking for. I have been putting off my university applications for some reason. I can't really explain exactly why, but I know it has something to do with reluctance to accept the fact that I'm growing up. High school is nearing its end. I'm picking up my graduation photos tomorrow, and they better turn out as great as I have imagined them my whole life. I personally believe that grad photos are single handedly the most important picture that one will take in their life. Some might argue and say that your wedding photos are more important. But I have to disagree and here's why: you only graduate high school once. You can get married as many times as you want. Therefore, grad pictures are highly important.
Next, I have a seriously important essay I need to write by the 21st that will ultimately determine my future. That's scary. If I do poorly on it, I do poorly in life because it will be the deciding factor of my English grade which will decide what kind of secondary education I will have which will decide what kind of career I'll have and disposable income. If my standard of living is high, I will be friends with other people who have a high standard of living, and therefore I will be in a more upper class society. If I'm in a upper class society, my children will go to a private school that will cost me a great deal of money but will provide a solid education for them and then my life will be passed on to them.
So with all that being said, I need to write an exceptional essay on a book I haven't quite read.
As you can imagine, I am experiencing an entirely more intense level of stress than I've ever seen in my life, so far.
Next, I have a seriously important essay I need to write by the 21st that will ultimately determine my future. That's scary. If I do poorly on it, I do poorly in life because it will be the deciding factor of my English grade which will decide what kind of secondary education I will have which will decide what kind of career I'll have and disposable income. If my standard of living is high, I will be friends with other people who have a high standard of living, and therefore I will be in a more upper class society. If I'm in a upper class society, my children will go to a private school that will cost me a great deal of money but will provide a solid education for them and then my life will be passed on to them.
So with all that being said, I need to write an exceptional essay on a book I haven't quite read.
As you can imagine, I am experiencing an entirely more intense level of stress than I've ever seen in my life, so far.
Monday, 26 November 2012
First Pay-cheque
My first pay cheque was pretty small, only 60.00$. Which is obviously better than nothing, but still futile. My next one will be much bigger, for sure. I blew 60$ in less than 12 hours of getting it. It was black Friday, shopping needed to be done. I kind of skipped my whole afternoon of school to go do a little bit of Christmas shopping. Practically every store in the mall was offering 50% off everything in the store, that's crazy! I took advantage of this deal, of course. I'm a little sad now cause there's about 30 cents in my bank account. I spent my last 15$ on the movies last night, and lunch today. The movie was totally worth every penny, I went to go see Breaking Dawn part 2 with my friend Ashley. It was intense. The popcorn was over-priced though. As for my lunch, I kind of needed to make that purchase. Otherwise I'd starve all day and I'd be even grumpier than I already am. Yes, I am in a bad mood today. I don't know why. It's either because I got 4 hours of sleep last night, or because everyone is just being more annoying than usual, or because I'm hungry. Thank God I don't work today after school because I need a power nap followed by a good night's sleep.
On Friday my boyfriend came to Ottawa to go see Justin Bieber live with me. He isn't much of a JB fan, but he came for me nonetheless. What a good boyfriend! He even offered to buy me a souvenir, but I insisted he didn't. That type of stuff is way over-priced, for no reason. I have memories, I don't need a material souvenir.
Unfortunately he left the next day, around supper time. He usually leaves on Sunday evening, but he had some family-friend, Christmas dinner thing he needed to attend back in Montreal on Saturday night. Which in my opinion is stupid, because Christmas isn't for another month. They're jumping the gun a little bit I think on the whole Christmas dinner in November. It's a bit much. But I had to let him leave, as much as I protested. I might go to Montreal on December 7th to see him if I can afford it. If not, I'm making him come here instead. I love how he does whatever I tell him to. How lucky am I?
Today I picked up some envelope from student services that is going to help me apply for university. I'm starting to feel a little nervous. I mean, I'm excited to graduate and move away for university, but I'm scared at the same time to be on my own. I better get into McGill otherwise I'm gonna flip a desk :)
On Friday my boyfriend came to Ottawa to go see Justin Bieber live with me. He isn't much of a JB fan, but he came for me nonetheless. What a good boyfriend! He even offered to buy me a souvenir, but I insisted he didn't. That type of stuff is way over-priced, for no reason. I have memories, I don't need a material souvenir.
Unfortunately he left the next day, around supper time. He usually leaves on Sunday evening, but he had some family-friend, Christmas dinner thing he needed to attend back in Montreal on Saturday night. Which in my opinion is stupid, because Christmas isn't for another month. They're jumping the gun a little bit I think on the whole Christmas dinner in November. It's a bit much. But I had to let him leave, as much as I protested. I might go to Montreal on December 7th to see him if I can afford it. If not, I'm making him come here instead. I love how he does whatever I tell him to. How lucky am I?
Today I picked up some envelope from student services that is going to help me apply for university. I'm starting to feel a little nervous. I mean, I'm excited to graduate and move away for university, but I'm scared at the same time to be on my own. I better get into McGill otherwise I'm gonna flip a desk :)
Monday, 19 November 2012
Personal Rewards
I'm receiving my report card today and believe it or not, I'm a little excited. I have a feeling my marks are going to be gorgeous. If they are, I might have to treat myself to a new shirt when I get paid or something. When I was younger my mom used to give me money for having good marks; I know that she can't exactly do that for me now, so I'm going to do it for myself kind of. Other than that, I'm saving every pay cheque between now and Christmas.
Also, with good grades and a good school record, I could run for valedictorian. My dream. Might be something to consider at the least. Being in competitions like that makes me nervous because I feel like not many people would vote for me, but I could try just for the hell of it.
My mom informed me this morning that she got a part-time job at Peoples Jewlers. I know it's only part-time, but it's better than nothing, so I am pleased about that. University applications are soon, I'm a little scared to be honest. Scared to ask my mom for 135$ to apply, that is.
Anyway, needless to say, I'm extremely eager for payday to come. It will feel nice to have more than 1.55$ in my bank account.
Also, with good grades and a good school record, I could run for valedictorian. My dream. Might be something to consider at the least. Being in competitions like that makes me nervous because I feel like not many people would vote for me, but I could try just for the hell of it.
My mom informed me this morning that she got a part-time job at Peoples Jewlers. I know it's only part-time, but it's better than nothing, so I am pleased about that. University applications are soon, I'm a little scared to be honest. Scared to ask my mom for 135$ to apply, that is.
Anyway, needless to say, I'm extremely eager for payday to come. It will feel nice to have more than 1.55$ in my bank account.
Sunday, 18 November 2012
Long Distance Relationships= Financial Sacrifice
If there's one thing that really bothers me, it's being in someones debt. I hate borrowing money, or borrowing anything I can be held liable for in general. This is why I will never own a credit card. It weighs on my conscience too much.
However, with that being said; this weekend was a small exception. I wanted to go to Montreal to visit Greg, even though I just saw him last weekend, I figured I may as well go. I mean, seeing each other once a week is still kind of futile. But anyways, I decided to take the train because my mother deems is safer than the bus. Safer, and twice the price. I got my step-dad to buy my ticket for me and told him I would pay him back as soon as possible. I knew he would want most of his money back as soon as I returned from my trip, but there's no way I could find 100$ that quickly. Turns out I don't get my first pay cheque for another two weeks which is mildly depressing, but at least I'll be getting a lot of money on it.
I ended up getting family friend which I gave to my step dad right after he bought me the ticket, but clearly I still owe him.
I left Montreal really early this morning. Like, 6 hours earlier than I usually leave. So technically I paid more money for a shorter trip. But my step dad insisted I get back into Ottawa before 1PM so that he could pick me up at the train station on his way home from work. Lazy.
I couldn't ask my boyfriend for money either because to my surprise he barely had any. We used what he did have to go out for dinner at Baton Rouge, which was lovely. We had nice, deep conversation at the table.
In other news, my mom may have a job soon. She's been getting a lot of interviews lately so we might be on to something. Which would be fantastic because I'm very excited for us to get our own apartment. For me it would only be for a short amount of time since I'm moving to Montreal most-likely for university. But for the time being, it would be nice.
However, with that being said; this weekend was a small exception. I wanted to go to Montreal to visit Greg, even though I just saw him last weekend, I figured I may as well go. I mean, seeing each other once a week is still kind of futile. But anyways, I decided to take the train because my mother deems is safer than the bus. Safer, and twice the price. I got my step-dad to buy my ticket for me and told him I would pay him back as soon as possible. I knew he would want most of his money back as soon as I returned from my trip, but there's no way I could find 100$ that quickly. Turns out I don't get my first pay cheque for another two weeks which is mildly depressing, but at least I'll be getting a lot of money on it.
I ended up getting family friend which I gave to my step dad right after he bought me the ticket, but clearly I still owe him.
I left Montreal really early this morning. Like, 6 hours earlier than I usually leave. So technically I paid more money for a shorter trip. But my step dad insisted I get back into Ottawa before 1PM so that he could pick me up at the train station on his way home from work. Lazy.
I couldn't ask my boyfriend for money either because to my surprise he barely had any. We used what he did have to go out for dinner at Baton Rouge, which was lovely. We had nice, deep conversation at the table.
In other news, my mom may have a job soon. She's been getting a lot of interviews lately so we might be on to something. Which would be fantastic because I'm very excited for us to get our own apartment. For me it would only be for a short amount of time since I'm moving to Montreal most-likely for university. But for the time being, it would be nice.
Thursday, 15 November 2012
Watch it!
Today I finished my second shift working at Watch it! It's really nice so far. My manager is 10x better than my old one, and the people I work with are so helpful. This other girl just got hired too and she seems like a really nice girl. At least I'm not the only new person, makes me feel a bit better. I sold my first watch today, I'm actually proud.
When I got home I decided I should start a load of laundry since I'm packing to go to Montreal for tomorrow. I know my boyfriend just came to visit me last weekend, and he's coming next weekend to go to the Justin Bieber concert with me, but I figured why not. I love seeing him, so I may as well take the opportunities that I can before December hits. I'm going to be extremely busy that month, probably working everyday over the holidays. Even though I'm still broke, I'm already thinking about what to get people for Christmas. I don't know why, but buying gifts for people makes me really happy. As much as I hate spending money (especially on other people), I get this warm fuzzy feeling when I get to give someone a gift.
As far as my mother knows, I'm taking the train for the first time by myself tomorrow. Which is not entirely true because once before I did, but I told her I was getting a ride with someone. She's very overprotective and always insists that I bring a friend. I think that's totally unreasonable because first of all, I'm seventeen years old. I'm not a baby anymore, I'm quite capable of getting on and off a train. Second of all, it's kind of a bit much to ask someone to spend 100$ to come with me to Montreal so that I can visit my boyfriend, nobody would be up for that. Plus I enjoy spending alone time with him.
Anyways, I'm just super excited that I get to spend another weekend with him. He makes me the happiest kid, ever. A lot of people are like "wow, you're in a long-distance realtionship, that must be hard!" I admit sometimes, yes it is. But not to the extent that people think necessarily. There are good things about being in one.
Number one: I get my personal space.
Since I see him once a week or once every two weeks, I really get to focus more on school and keeping my grades up. I don't spend all my time with my boyfriend, I learn to be independant.
Number two: I don't need to worry about looking nice since I don't see him all the time. I can go to school looking like a bum, and he won't care because he won't see.
Number three: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. (Enough said)
Number four: You really get to know each other on a deeper level, and not just necessarily on a physical level because your relationship is solely based on communication. Constantly texting, skyping, calling, emailing, facebooking, you really get to know that persons personality thoroughly.
I have way too much time on my hands.
When I got home I decided I should start a load of laundry since I'm packing to go to Montreal for tomorrow. I know my boyfriend just came to visit me last weekend, and he's coming next weekend to go to the Justin Bieber concert with me, but I figured why not. I love seeing him, so I may as well take the opportunities that I can before December hits. I'm going to be extremely busy that month, probably working everyday over the holidays. Even though I'm still broke, I'm already thinking about what to get people for Christmas. I don't know why, but buying gifts for people makes me really happy. As much as I hate spending money (especially on other people), I get this warm fuzzy feeling when I get to give someone a gift.
As far as my mother knows, I'm taking the train for the first time by myself tomorrow. Which is not entirely true because once before I did, but I told her I was getting a ride with someone. She's very overprotective and always insists that I bring a friend. I think that's totally unreasonable because first of all, I'm seventeen years old. I'm not a baby anymore, I'm quite capable of getting on and off a train. Second of all, it's kind of a bit much to ask someone to spend 100$ to come with me to Montreal so that I can visit my boyfriend, nobody would be up for that. Plus I enjoy spending alone time with him.
Anyways, I'm just super excited that I get to spend another weekend with him. He makes me the happiest kid, ever. A lot of people are like "wow, you're in a long-distance realtionship, that must be hard!" I admit sometimes, yes it is. But not to the extent that people think necessarily. There are good things about being in one.
Number one: I get my personal space.
Since I see him once a week or once every two weeks, I really get to focus more on school and keeping my grades up. I don't spend all my time with my boyfriend, I learn to be independant.
Number two: I don't need to worry about looking nice since I don't see him all the time. I can go to school looking like a bum, and he won't care because he won't see.
Number three: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. (Enough said)
Number four: You really get to know each other on a deeper level, and not just necessarily on a physical level because your relationship is solely based on communication. Constantly texting, skyping, calling, emailing, facebooking, you really get to know that persons personality thoroughly.
I have way too much time on my hands.
Tuesday, 13 November 2012
Money Goes Fast
This may have been one of the best weekends of my life. I actually had such a fun time. My boyfriend came to visit me from MTL and it was lovely. We spent a solid amount of quality bonding time together; getting lost downtown for hours, going on dinner and lunch dates, watching tv, going for drives, all that cute stuff. I was really sad when he left, I wanted to cry a little... But I put on a brave face cause I know I'm going to see him in two weeks probably.
When we got lost downtown, my initial mission was to go to this place called "The Gold Lobby" which is essentially a place where you bring in gold that you don't use, and sell it for cash. My mom did that a few weeks ago and she got quite a bit of extra money. The only gold I had was the gold that my great gradmother left for me when she past away. It was nice and all, but I never wore it, it just sat in my jewlery box 24/7. I felt bad selling it, but I needed the money. I have to admit, I feel extremely guilty deep down but in a way I don't think my grandmother would've cared, I'm sure she would have wanted me to have the money instead to buy myself something nice. Or maybe that's just me justifying it. Either way, if my mom found out what I did, she would slap me (exaggeration)
Anyways, I got $220
Made me happy. (Please note the use of past tense)
All the money is gone.
Boyfriends are expensive, and so am I.
When we got lost downtown, my initial mission was to go to this place called "The Gold Lobby" which is essentially a place where you bring in gold that you don't use, and sell it for cash. My mom did that a few weeks ago and she got quite a bit of extra money. The only gold I had was the gold that my great gradmother left for me when she past away. It was nice and all, but I never wore it, it just sat in my jewlery box 24/7. I felt bad selling it, but I needed the money. I have to admit, I feel extremely guilty deep down but in a way I don't think my grandmother would've cared, I'm sure she would have wanted me to have the money instead to buy myself something nice. Or maybe that's just me justifying it. Either way, if my mom found out what I did, she would slap me (exaggeration)
Anyways, I got $220
Made me happy. (Please note the use of past tense)
All the money is gone.
Boyfriends are expensive, and so am I.
Shift Number One
Today I have my first shift at my new job. I'm actually kind of nervous, I hate starting work at a new place and not knowing anybody, or what you're doing. But at least I'm finally going to be making some money which is amazing because Christmas is coming around the corner and I need to save up for shopping. I think I'm going to buy my boyfriend a really fancy watch. Since I work at a watch store I'm sure I'll be very knowledgable on the subject matter, and I'll get a nice discount. I feel obligated to buy something for each of his family members as well since I know them, and his parents let me stay there on weekends sometimes, it's the least I can do. I think I'll get his mom some fancy expensive soaps, creams, body spray, that kind of stuff. Women love things that smell good, it's a fact.
I tried to look extra nice today so that I can strut into work with confidence.
On another note, I have 80's in all the classes that are going to help me get into university which makes me really happy because I'm trying to get into McGill. Early acceptance applications are soon. I think I have a pretty solid chance of getting in. I'm super excited! I can't wait to graduate so that I can move.
I tried to look extra nice today so that I can strut into work with confidence.
On another note, I have 80's in all the classes that are going to help me get into university which makes me really happy because I'm trying to get into McGill. Early acceptance applications are soon. I think I have a pretty solid chance of getting in. I'm super excited! I can't wait to graduate so that I can move.
Friday, 9 November 2012
TGIF
Honestly, thank God it's Friday. I could not be in a better mood. I can already tell that this is going to be the best day of my life. I don't know why, I just do.
I had a job interview yesterday at this place called Watch It. I got hired. Can we all just take a moment to take this in. I am finally employed. Praise Jesus. The interview went extremely well (clearly) and my employer was this super nice Italian lady, so I think we're going to get a long very well. I am so excited to be working there. Not only do I get minimum wage PLUS commission, but I get 40% watches. That's amazing. First of all I'm going to be rich (exaggeration) and second of all, I'm going to own a variety of expensive, high-quality watches. I went to my interview wearing this really nice watch that my lovely boyfriend got for me for my birthday back in September, and my employer actually noticed and complimented it. I was so flattered.
Speaking of my boyfriend, he's coming to Ottawa today. I'm so happy, I miss him so much. I have actually planned out a very fun-filled weekend for us. He should be getting here this afternoon around 4PM. Which is nice because it gives me some time to go home and make myself look nice after school before he arrives. I want to just take some time to catch up, then I think we're going to go see Skyfall (the new James Bond movie that just came out today). Maybe we'll go out for dinner or something, have a nice little date night.
Saturday we have this girl with a really nice camera that goes to my school who's going to take professional looking pictures of us infront of some colourful leaves. Which is perfect because I absolutely need some new pictures with him. I am totally going to be girlfriend of the year and make him breakfast that day.
I had a job interview yesterday at this place called Watch It. I got hired. Can we all just take a moment to take this in. I am finally employed. Praise Jesus. The interview went extremely well (clearly) and my employer was this super nice Italian lady, so I think we're going to get a long very well. I am so excited to be working there. Not only do I get minimum wage PLUS commission, but I get 40% watches. That's amazing. First of all I'm going to be rich (exaggeration) and second of all, I'm going to own a variety of expensive, high-quality watches. I went to my interview wearing this really nice watch that my lovely boyfriend got for me for my birthday back in September, and my employer actually noticed and complimented it. I was so flattered.
Speaking of my boyfriend, he's coming to Ottawa today. I'm so happy, I miss him so much. I have actually planned out a very fun-filled weekend for us. He should be getting here this afternoon around 4PM. Which is nice because it gives me some time to go home and make myself look nice after school before he arrives. I want to just take some time to catch up, then I think we're going to go see Skyfall (the new James Bond movie that just came out today). Maybe we'll go out for dinner or something, have a nice little date night.
Saturday we have this girl with a really nice camera that goes to my school who's going to take professional looking pictures of us infront of some colourful leaves. Which is perfect because I absolutely need some new pictures with him. I am totally going to be girlfriend of the year and make him breakfast that day.
Wednesday, 7 November 2012
Friends vs. Me Being Poor
Today I would like to tell you all about my very good friend, Ashley. She's probably one of the most generous people I have ever met. Ever. This girl helps me out so much in my time of need. Yesterday she bought me lunch and dinner. I am super thankful cause had she not, I would've starved. Since all I brought to eat was a container of dry tuna and a baby cucumber.
On top of making sure that I am fed, she is giving me money to go visit my boyfriend in Montreal. Which makes me extremely happy and excited. I love going to Montreal, and I love going to see Greg. Two things that I thoroughly enjoy. I totally believe in karma; so by her doing all these selfless things for me, good things will come to her as well. If I ever get rich, (or die trying) I will personally buy her any lavish food of her choice for a month. Until then, I kind of feel bad that she's helping me and there isn't much I can do to repay her at the moment except for express my gratitude.
She bought a really nice outfit yesterday, and she's wearing it today.
It's nice.
On the other hand, not tomorrow. But the next day, Gregoir is driving to Ottawa to spend the weekend with me and I couldn't be more thrilled. The weekend never feels long enough, but I'll take what I can. I'm trying to play a nice, fun-filled weekend for us. But there isn't much to do in Ottawa. Nonetheless I shall attempt to entertain my dear boyfriend for the time given.
My friend has a really high-quality, professional camera and she's going to take pictures of us infront of some colorful fall leaves.
How lovely.
On top of making sure that I am fed, she is giving me money to go visit my boyfriend in Montreal. Which makes me extremely happy and excited. I love going to Montreal, and I love going to see Greg. Two things that I thoroughly enjoy. I totally believe in karma; so by her doing all these selfless things for me, good things will come to her as well. If I ever get rich, (or die trying) I will personally buy her any lavish food of her choice for a month. Until then, I kind of feel bad that she's helping me and there isn't much I can do to repay her at the moment except for express my gratitude.
She bought a really nice outfit yesterday, and she's wearing it today.
It's nice.
On the other hand, not tomorrow. But the next day, Gregoir is driving to Ottawa to spend the weekend with me and I couldn't be more thrilled. The weekend never feels long enough, but I'll take what I can. I'm trying to play a nice, fun-filled weekend for us. But there isn't much to do in Ottawa. Nonetheless I shall attempt to entertain my dear boyfriend for the time given.
My friend has a really high-quality, professional camera and she's going to take pictures of us infront of some colorful fall leaves.
How lovely.
Tuesday, 6 November 2012
Perfectly Inexpensive Jeans
I got my last cheque a few days ago from my previous job. My ex employer threatened not to give me my cheque because I didn't bring back my uniform. Which first of all, he never informed me I needed to do. The threat was totally unnecessary. I looked at him as if there was no way he could be serious. He was stupid to think I didn't know my rights. I grabbed my cheque from him and told him he'll get his uniform back when I decide to give it to him and that the money was mine. I ripped open the envelop and saw that my last cheque was futile. But better than nothing.
So yesterday after school I went to the mall to return this outfit I had purchased the day before that didn't end up looking very nice on me after all. Instead I bought a pair of jeans. Jeans usually don't look flattering on me, but these ones were different. I call them miracle jeans. They were only fifteen dollars! What a steal!
So yesterday after school I went to the mall to return this outfit I had purchased the day before that didn't end up looking very nice on me after all. Instead I bought a pair of jeans. Jeans usually don't look flattering on me, but these ones were different. I call them miracle jeans. They were only fifteen dollars! What a steal!
Monday, 5 November 2012
Golden Days
This past weekend I realized that I needed a jacket pretty badly otherwise I was going to freeze in the crisp Canadian weather. There was no way I could pull off the jean jacket all winter. One of my best friends who lives accross town drove to my house and left me one of her old jackets on my door step so that I'd have a pleasant little surprise when I got home.
I was out with my mother, selling gold. Turns out we had a pretty solid amount of gold jewlery just laying around the house for what ever reason. We ended up getting $400 from just a few pieces. Apparently the value of gold is pretty high these days. She didn't share any of the money with me, so I'm still broke. However, when my boyfriend comes to town this weekend I'm making him bring me back to the place that buys people's gold because I have a few gold items I could sell for my own profit.
I'm still looking for a new job. Plenty of places in the local mall are hiring at this time of year because Christmas is coming soon, so it shouldn't be difficult to find a temporary retail position.
Or maybe it will be.
I was out with my mother, selling gold. Turns out we had a pretty solid amount of gold jewlery just laying around the house for what ever reason. We ended up getting $400 from just a few pieces. Apparently the value of gold is pretty high these days. She didn't share any of the money with me, so I'm still broke. However, when my boyfriend comes to town this weekend I'm making him bring me back to the place that buys people's gold because I have a few gold items I could sell for my own profit.
I'm still looking for a new job. Plenty of places in the local mall are hiring at this time of year because Christmas is coming soon, so it shouldn't be difficult to find a temporary retail position.
Or maybe it will be.
Thursday, 1 November 2012
Stressful Moves
Well, a few days ago my mother and I got kicked out of the townhouse we were living in because my mom was failing to pay the rent. I kind of knew this was going to happen since she's been unemployed for so long, there's no way she would have been able to keep up with rent. Anyways, we have until December 1st to find a new place. In one month my mom and I both need to find a job since apparently I'm going to be helping pay rent too. All the apartments that are somewhat affordable are all in the shadier end of town, where I'd rather not live. There's no affordable apartments in the neighborhood I'm living in now, so I'm gonna be living far from all my friends and my school.
This is the worst possible time that this could all be happening. I'm already stressed out with keeping my marks up so that I get into university, picking universities to apply to, maintaining a long-distance relationship (which seems to be a constant battle, may I add,) maintaining somewhat of a social life and trying to find a job. Times are hard, that's for sure. Moving homes is the last thing I want to worry about. I'm trying to eat more vegetables to stay healthy, all this stress can't be good for me. I just have way too much to think about. Monday after school I bussed to two different malls and handed out 13 resumes. Someone has to hire me, even if it's only seasonal. At this point I'll take anything for a bit of cash. I need enough money to spoil my family (even though there is only two of us), and my boyfriends family. I like his better than mine.
I think I need a vacation.
Too bad I couldn't afford one, even if I tried.
This is the worst possible time that this could all be happening. I'm already stressed out with keeping my marks up so that I get into university, picking universities to apply to, maintaining a long-distance relationship (which seems to be a constant battle, may I add,) maintaining somewhat of a social life and trying to find a job. Times are hard, that's for sure. Moving homes is the last thing I want to worry about. I'm trying to eat more vegetables to stay healthy, all this stress can't be good for me. I just have way too much to think about. Monday after school I bussed to two different malls and handed out 13 resumes. Someone has to hire me, even if it's only seasonal. At this point I'll take anything for a bit of cash. I need enough money to spoil my family (even though there is only two of us), and my boyfriends family. I like his better than mine.
I think I need a vacation.
Too bad I couldn't afford one, even if I tried.
Monday, 29 October 2012
Rich People vs. Me
Almost two weeks ago, back when I did have a job, I bussed to Montreal with a few of my friends to visit my boyfriend and his mansion. I think it's kind of ironic that his family is so wealthy and mine is the very opposite. I stepped into his home with caution, everything seemed to delicate. I was so envious of his lifestyle, although I tried to act as non-chalant about it as possible. On Sunday his family was having a little get-together for my boyfriends older brother's birthday. His whole family was there, and I could not feel more intimidated. I tried to dress as semi-formal as I could however everyone else's outfit seemed to top mine. I guess you can't fake dressing rich. I tried to look respectable, at least I accomplished that much. Anyways, we sat down at a long table to eat lunch. I was so amused by the typical rich-person chandalier that hung above the typical rich-person dinner table. I glanced around trying to look like impressed, but not too impressed. The family debated about taxes, private schools, education, politics, money, etc. All in French. I was constantly asking my boyfriend to translate the conversation for me so that I didn't feel totally useless to the conversation. I stayed attentive, even though I had no idea what they were talking about. I don't understand or speak French well. It's always been something I've wanted to learn, but never got around to doing.
Being around these people just inspired me to want to be extremely succesful. My dream is to have a big fancy blue house with white shutters and a white picket fence, with a little white mailbox, a small dog that I can carry around in a purse, and a pool. I want my kids to go to all girls or all boys private school where they have to wear uniforms, and get a really high quality education. I want to go to work every day dressed in heels and a pencil skirt and come home to a husband who brings home the same amount of money as I do for our perfect little family in our perfect house.
I sat on the germ-infested, cold bus waiting to be home. My head rest smelt like dirty, sweaty socks. I plugged my headphones in to block out the chatter coming from the stragglers that sat behind me. When I finally got back to my city, I had to sit on another bus to get home. This one wasn't nearly as bad, smelt way better that's for sure. As I walked up to my small town-house, I stopped and stood in the driveway and just looked at it for a moment. I sighed heavily, then headed inside. I opened my fridge and pulled out a tupperware that was previously meant to hold margarine, but was re-used to hold leftover spaghetti. I ripped open the lid in frustration, and slid it into the microwave. I set it for one minute, then pressed start. But it was broken.
I can imagine the look on my face when I discovered I couldn't even heat up my leftovers; disgusted crossed with unimpressed.
Being around these people just inspired me to want to be extremely succesful. My dream is to have a big fancy blue house with white shutters and a white picket fence, with a little white mailbox, a small dog that I can carry around in a purse, and a pool. I want my kids to go to all girls or all boys private school where they have to wear uniforms, and get a really high quality education. I want to go to work every day dressed in heels and a pencil skirt and come home to a husband who brings home the same amount of money as I do for our perfect little family in our perfect house.
I sat on the germ-infested, cold bus waiting to be home. My head rest smelt like dirty, sweaty socks. I plugged my headphones in to block out the chatter coming from the stragglers that sat behind me. When I finally got back to my city, I had to sit on another bus to get home. This one wasn't nearly as bad, smelt way better that's for sure. As I walked up to my small town-house, I stopped and stood in the driveway and just looked at it for a moment. I sighed heavily, then headed inside. I opened my fridge and pulled out a tupperware that was previously meant to hold margarine, but was re-used to hold leftover spaghetti. I ripped open the lid in frustration, and slid it into the microwave. I set it for one minute, then pressed start. But it was broken.
I can imagine the look on my face when I discovered I couldn't even heat up my leftovers; disgusted crossed with unimpressed.
That was the end of my night.
Home Bound
You'd be surprised how little there is to do without spending money. I spent my entire weekend inside my house watching "Friends" because I couldn't afford to do anything else. All I can do is sit around my house and wait for Home Depot to call my house to let me know that they have a job for me. I was beginning to question my sanity, and occasionally it would respond. Being stuck inside my house for 48 hours was really taking its toll on me. 48 hours of soul-searching can really start to freak you out. My mother was off at her yoga classes all weekend, so I had the house to myself. I talked to my boyfriend on Skype for basically all of my Saturday night, he made me feel less anti-social. I'd really like to go visit him in Montreal soon, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen any time soon unless I find a way to have enough disposable income to spare on a trip. I feel bad making him come here more than I go there, but I guess for now that's the best I can do. If there's one thing I've learnt about long distance relationships, it's that they are expensive. Which is quite unfortunate for me since money is exactly what I'm missing. I really hope I get a job soon, I need the money and I need something to do in my spare time.
Friday, 26 October 2012
OC Transpo
So recently my mother let me know that she may not be able to drive me to and from school anymore because it's wasting gas money that she doesn't exactly have. This wouldn't be such a big deal to me if bus fare wasn't going to cost me a fortune that I don't have either. She let me know that she'll be able to drive me for the next two weeks but after that, I'm on my own. I quit my job about a week ago, and then used all my money to go visit my boyfriend in Montreal, which was totally worth it don't get me wrong, but it was really starting to hit me that I need money. I've been applying to jobs frequently, and even managed to get an interview at Home Depot. Although I wish I could find a job somewhere better, at this point I'm too deperate to care.
I reached out to someone who could possibly help me figure out a way to organize transportation for me to get to and from school, and not to my surprise, she was able to help me. Turns out my school offers free bus far for families who live far and don't make a lot of money. Or in my case, live far and don't make any money. My application was recently approved, and by the end of the month I will have my own bus pass.
I kind of feel like a charity case, but at the same time, so grateful. I realize that deperate times call for desperate measures, and I need to put my pride aside for this one.
I reached out to someone who could possibly help me figure out a way to organize transportation for me to get to and from school, and not to my surprise, she was able to help me. Turns out my school offers free bus far for families who live far and don't make a lot of money. Or in my case, live far and don't make any money. My application was recently approved, and by the end of the month I will have my own bus pass.
I kind of feel like a charity case, but at the same time, so grateful. I realize that deperate times call for desperate measures, and I need to put my pride aside for this one.
Wal-Mart
My family had been having a hard time financially these days. But I never thought it wouid get this bad.
I stood outside my school, cold in my three-year-old jean jacket that was definitely not seasonal. I was waiting for my mother to come pick me up, as she usually does. She arrived late, as usual. I hopped into the car, but said nothing. She usually asks me how my day was, and I usually reply with one word. But today she didn't really say anything at all. She started driving the opposite direction of where we lived, so I asked where she was going. She said she needed to pick up a few things at the store. I was uninterested because I knew neither of us had money, so I wouldn't be getting anything.
I really wanted a new jacket. One that would actually keep me warm because the Canadian weather was slowly turning colder and colder everyday we approached winter. My mom pulled up infront of our local Wal-Mart. We usually do our groceries there, so I figured we'd finally be getting so food in our house. But no. This is when things got really weird. We started walking towards the cosmetic section first. My mom explained that she needed to buy makeup, and maybe a shirt. These are words that typically came up if we went to the mall, but never while walking into Wal-Mart.
At this point, I had somewhat accepted the fact that we had practically hit rock bottom. We were buying our sweaters at Wal-Mart. I don't care if this sounds spoiled. My whole life my family was making good money, and I never had to worry about if I was going to have a winter jacket, and now we're shopping at Wal-Mart for something other than food. I was ashamed walking out of that building. I tried to hide my bags behind my back incase I ran into somebody I knew.
On the bright side, I got gloves for 89 cents.
I stood outside my school, cold in my three-year-old jean jacket that was definitely not seasonal. I was waiting for my mother to come pick me up, as she usually does. She arrived late, as usual. I hopped into the car, but said nothing. She usually asks me how my day was, and I usually reply with one word. But today she didn't really say anything at all. She started driving the opposite direction of where we lived, so I asked where she was going. She said she needed to pick up a few things at the store. I was uninterested because I knew neither of us had money, so I wouldn't be getting anything.
I really wanted a new jacket. One that would actually keep me warm because the Canadian weather was slowly turning colder and colder everyday we approached winter. My mom pulled up infront of our local Wal-Mart. We usually do our groceries there, so I figured we'd finally be getting so food in our house. But no. This is when things got really weird. We started walking towards the cosmetic section first. My mom explained that she needed to buy makeup, and maybe a shirt. These are words that typically came up if we went to the mall, but never while walking into Wal-Mart.
At this point, I had somewhat accepted the fact that we had practically hit rock bottom. We were buying our sweaters at Wal-Mart. I don't care if this sounds spoiled. My whole life my family was making good money, and I never had to worry about if I was going to have a winter jacket, and now we're shopping at Wal-Mart for something other than food. I was ashamed walking out of that building. I tried to hide my bags behind my back incase I ran into somebody I knew.
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